We all know that going to a British High School was a serious anti-climax. Especially when it is compared to some of the ridiculous things we see in films – grand halls made from rich mahogany and libraries that are graced with many leather bound books.
But, the reality was something completely different and 100 times more basic.
Here are 19 things that only kids who went to a British High School will understand. Enjoy!
1. The expectation of your main hall:
You expected something grand and regal for your high school.
The reality:
When it came down to it, assemblies were held in a tight, sweaty hall that had loads of classrooms off it.
2. You expected Hogwarts exterior when you moved from Primary School to High School. Instead, you got this…
I think every movie set you up for disappointment. When it came to seeing British High Schools in films, we saw something extravagant.
3. The ‘temporary’ buildings lasted for the whole duration of your school career
These buildings were set up whilst other parts of the school building were getting redone. However, they definitely weren’t temporary because they stayed at the school longer than you did.
4. These radiators either burnt you or froze you to death. Either way, you didn’t want to be sat next to it.
Every single school in the UK had these radiators in them. They were cheap, tacky and half the paint had come off of them. They sure knew how to make a room look shabby.
5. Someone always drew stupid stuff on the chairs
You couldn’t sit on a chair without it have been vandalised at some point. Whether this was a vulgar image drawn on with tipex, a curse word sharpied on it, or even worse… chewing gum stuck to the bottom. We hated accidentally touching someone’s dried up chewing gum on the chair. Gross.
6. They were also cracked ALL the time
The chairs were SO old and this was because the school didn’t want to invest in our comfort. Or anything else at all to be honest. I think every girl has ripped their tights on a crack in a chair… so annoying!
7. There was always crap written over every desk
You frequently saw someone’s number with ‘ring for some fun’ written underneath. We had such an immature sense of humour when we were younger. But we genuinely had to graffiti because we were that bored!
8. And stupid graffiti in the toilets
There was easily the most pathetic graffiti in the toilets than anywhere else in the school. Did people get bored whilst on the toilet? Or did they think some of the stuff they were writing on the walls was actually funny. This one was definitely done by a year seven who thought they were bad.
9. Your all time favourite lesson was woodwork
We looked forward to being able to do this subject throughout the whole of school. There was nothing better purely because it was pretty much practical the whole time. We made some crap stuff though.
10. And you did anything to be able to use this machine in there
There was nothing worse than not knowing what you were doing, so just standing by this machine and drilling holes into bits of wood and plastic seemed like a good idea.
11. Non-uniform day was easily the most stressful day we had
The build-up to non-uniform day was dramatic to say the least. The whole week was full of discussions about what you were going to wear on this day. Shout out to all the people who still went to school in their uniforms… we all felt so sorry for you guys.
12. It was the birthplace of some of the most embarrassing pictures of us
We all know that we did some seriously embarrassing stuff when we were younger. There was nothing worse than seeing these haunt us when we thought they were long gone.
13. Our school dinner selection was nothing short of abysmal
When we got to high school, it got to the point that we just ended up buying our school lunches because we couldn’t be bothered with the effort of making packed lunches. However, we were just greeted with disappointment when it came down to deciding what we wanted to eat. Either this, or you just bought a cookie and saved up the rest of your dinner money so you could buy alcohol at the weekend!
14. And there was always that one kid that you had to avoid because you knew your tie was going to get peanuted if not
If you were this dreaded guy then shame on you. Everyone avoided this fate because it was impossible to undo your tie if it was pulled that tightly.
15. Also, the shorter your tie… the cooler you were
Apparently, your coolness was measured by the size of your tie. The knot at the top was left really loose and your tie as short as you could have it. Every single teacher had something to say about this – but you didn’t care.
16. Your coolness was also measured by the lowness of your bag
We all used to have rucksacks when we were at school. There was nothing that rated your coolness more than how low your bag was.
17. The carpets were all like this
Every single room had these carpets in them. The feel of this carpet was absolutely AWFUL. There was nothing worse than getting carpet burn on this.
18. And your football nets looked a lot like this
In the field where you used to play football, all you had were these nets. There wasn’t ever any netting behind this and they were always dented and rusty.
19. To top off 5 years of high school fun, we had our Prom. A hugely anticipated event that we all ended up looking ugly for
We spent the whole of year 11 deciding what dress and suits we were going to wear for prom. Then the day before we got a spray tan – which gave us nothing but orange regret. We tried to salvage this by getting our hair and make-up done. But it was guaranteed that this looked horrendous too.